A Terrible Tale of TJ's Tenet

Normally on Sunday night, I host a laid-back $10 tournament at my place. This particular Sunday, I was scheduled to work the dinner shift, so I cancelled poker at my place. Then I got out of work much earlier in the evening than I anticipated, and I came home to a message from USC Gabe, inviting me to his cash game that night. Let's play some poker!

Ignoring Gabe's cramped, messy studio apartment, his game is a good one. Populated mainly with rich college kids, there's way more action than strategy going on here.

I arrived to be the 4th at the table. Shawna (who knew me from the PCS) sat on my left, Freshman Pat was in front of me, with host Gabe on my right. Plenty of aggression right off the bat - like there was some sort of unwritten agreement that there should be at least one raise before the flop.

I was unprepared for the game. Without mentioning it in his message, Gabe had "doubled up" his game since I last visited. Instead of the $20 max buy-in, 25/50 cent blind structure I was expecting, I sat down to a $40 max, $.50/$1 blind set up. My wallet was short, too. I was expecting that $90 to be good for 4+ buy-ins.

Gabe's an odd character. Fifth year (or more) senior. Slacker. Poker skills >> social skills. Annoying laugh. Bets so often, it appears checking twice in a hand is against his religion. He had an informative hand against Pat:

The board read As, Kh, 8h. Gabe held A4-hearts to Pat's K8 offsuit. Gabe bet strongly at the pot, and Pat, who started the hand with more than $100, (re)raised him, all-in. A quick pot odds calculation told everyone that Gabe did not have nearly the odds to call. Gabe stated flat out that he has trouble folding the nut flush draw, and called. Sure enough, his queen of hearts showed up on the turn, and the river didn't fill Pat's boat. Pat groused a bit about what he considered a bad call and a horrible result. I can't say I blame him.

Gabe's got a lot of gamble in him... stone cold bluffs, semi-bluffs. He loves the feeling of taking pots away from people with bets and raises.

It was about this time that Frat-tastic Bit Player (FBP) showed up. I forgot his name during the game, and called him "Van Wilder" once or twice. Apparently this loud, offensive, impatient, sportcoat-clad jackass had a line in the movie Legally Blonde. He thought he was clever when he repeatedly referred to QQ as "pocket bitches".

I lost most of my first $40 to Pat, holding A9. At the turn, it looked like it was going to be a split pot, with a board of AK2, 2. When the river was a 6, I called Pat's bet (instead of pushing all-in) to see the bad news. The kicker to his ace was a 6. I rebought for another $20.
I don't remember the big loss that led me to buy-in for another $20. I think it was a few small losses. They add up quickly with the big blind at $1 and $35 or so in front of you.

So I was in for $80 total, with about $35 in front of me, when the breaks and the cards started to go my way. Shawna had busted out, Eric from the downtown LA game arrived with a few others. At one point, we had 8 around the table.

Two cashouts and two bustouts later, we were back to four-handed. Bryce on my left, FBP in front of me, and Gabe on my right. I had $85 in front of me when it happened...

Unlike when I first sat down, our late evening four-handed session had fewer preflop raises. I limped in with Q8-clubs. The four of us saw the flop: 833, rainbow. The blinds checked, so I bet $3 at a $4 pot. Only Gabe called. The turn was the 5h, putting two hearts on the board, and making low straight draws a possibility. Gabe once again checked to me. I bet $5 at a $10 pot. Gabe raised to make it $15 total. I didn't give too much thought to folding here. Gabe is not bashful about pushing people off hands or semi-bluffing with drawing hands. Already tonight he's shown that he'll bet his draws hard and will stubbornly stick with some of them.

I reraised another $15, to make it $30 total. And then The Stall began...

Stacking and unstacking chips. A stare. Asking me "Hey, Mike, whaddaya got?" That annoying laugh. A complete count of the pot. He was apparently calculating pot odds.

Meanwhile, FBP is losing his shit. I think his head was about to explode, he was getting so impatient at Gabe.

After what seemed like about five minutes, Gabe announced that he was all-in. He had me covered, so I'd be playing for the $50 or so in front of me. Now it was my turn to start thinking...

That's not what I expected him to do. What's going on here? Is this another case of Gabe semi-bluffing? Does he sense I'm weak? Could he have been sticking around with Ax-hearts, or two baby hearts that now give him a straight draw to go with his flush draw? Is he making a play on me with a pair of 8's with a weak kicker? Would he really go to all of that trouble to count the pot if he had a 3?

And from FBP: "You reraise him, and now you're going to think about his all-in? What the fuck!"

I called.

I was fooled. Bamboozled. I reraised for information, then let Gabe's lengthy ruse mislead me from the answer I received. Ultimately, I didn't think he would have put on such a show if he had a strong hand. It all looks so obvious in hindsight. I feel like a donkey just writing this.

He showed 83. A flopped full house. Masterfully played.

Irate and broke, I left immediately. It wasn't until I started the car that I remembered a pearl of wisdom I read from the very first poker book I ever purchased. Rattling around in my numb skull, the soft Texan twang of TJ Cloutier reverberated: "Don't go broke in an unraised pot."

Thanks, TJ. Next time...

$80 in, $0 out. And a lesson that's been hammered home.